加
拿大覺友
Pierre Kwok (2019年6月
2日)
(Note: All-stages
meditation member, Mr. Pierre Kwok, who suffered from "Parkinson’s
disease" for over 10 years, has gone through various Chinese and
Western treatment methods. However, his conditions have continued to
deteriorate. After practicing more than a month of All-stages
meditation, his bodily movement has been convincingly improved. In the
past, because the brain could not fully control the lips and tongue,
his speech became soft and slurred. And now his speech is articulate
and natural. Previously he has posture instability which led to
impaired balance and frequent falls. Now he has better
balance..........etc. Hopefully the following essay written by Mr.
Pierre Kwok will arouse the attention of the public and the medical
community. ―― Teacher Yeung )
My fight with Parkinson Disease
My
name is Pierre Kwok, I am 65 years old, and I have Parkinson disease
since I was 46 year old. Parkinson disease is a neurological
disease. It means part of the brain that is responsible for the
controls movement is dying and there is no cure for the disease.
There
are many symptoms for Parkinson disease, includes the following:
resting hand tremor, slow movements, stiff & rigid muscles, very
soft spoken voice, leg and foot muscle cramps, no strength in legs and
feet, walking posture is leaning forward, drooling, losing balance, …..
Click the link below:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LWl3PLLJKfE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhj1PktNA1c
How it began:
It
was on o―ne afternoon many years ago, I was talking on the phone, my
left hand trembled suddenly, and the hand tremor lasted shortly and can
be stopped at will. I felt weird but didn’t pay too much attention to
it. The hand tremors came back a few times in that day. The word
“Parkinson disease” has surfaced my mind, but I was not too worried.
Gradually the hand tremor was getting more frequent and more severe and
it lasted longer and I could not stop the tremor. The word Parkinson
disease came to my mind again; I started to worry and began looking up
for the signs and symptoms for Parkinson disease (PD). I went to
my doctor and told him what have happened, he said that I was too young
to have PD, there are many so many reasons that will caused hand
tremors, such as stressed, tired, not having enough sleep, too much
coffee….. That could triggered hand tremors, it could be a nerve in the
system that might have caused the problem, He sent me to a muscle
specialist, which revealed there is nothing wrong my muscle and nerve
system is fine, I have cad scan of my brain which shows no sign of
damage, and finally I was referred to a neurologist, the neurologist
asked me many questions and he asked me to walk in the hallway back and
forth, and he tested out my flexibility of my joins, then he concluded
that I have Parkinson disease. I didn’t react too strongly to the bad
news when the doctor me that I have PD. It was until the next day
afternoon, I felt very badly, I thought my life is over, I have this
incurable disease that will not kill me, but I will be paralyzed for
the rest my life. I was asking God why? Why is me. I was praying to my
god to have miracle on me, heal me so that I can go out and showed to
others that God has mercy on me and healed me. I was in denial
state for over 1 year. From that time I have tried the Chinese Chi-gong
and Tai chi, massage, whirlpool, acupuncture, and some famous Chinese
doctors but nothing worked.
Coping with the disease
As
times gone by, the muscle stiffness was getting worse; most of the PD
signs and symptoms have surfaced one by one. The body’s muscle
tightened up it was hard as rock, making a move would be
difficult. My voice was so low that people can hardly hearing me.
Sometimes when I have to repeat more than 2 to 3 times, they will
pretend that they have heard what I said, but I can tell that they
didn’t hear me. I began not to engage in talking to people, especially
in a noisy environment. I used to love singing; the disease has also
taken part of my singing away. Although the PD has caused me many
inconvenience and embarrassment, with the exception of muscle cramps,
it didn’t cause any pain. It was bearable and my attitude was very
positive
My doctor told me that daily exercise will do many good
things to fight against the PD. I started learning to play
tennis; it was the love of the tennis that has kept me going every
day. I played tennis 3 to 4 times a week. Players who play with
me didn’t know that I have Parkinson disease. During the first 12
years, the PD didn’t interfere with my work and daily life.
My health condition is getting worse
It
was about 3 years ago, the disease has finally taken control of my
body, and I started losing my strength and my balance when I was
playing tennis. My walking used to be very good. I can control my
walking pace and normal walking will not cause any problem to me. But
the good times have gone now. I am losing strength in my legs. Getting
up from sitting positions will be very difficult; walking is an
adventure to me. I began losing my controls of my 2 legs. The emerging
of freezing of my legs has caused few falls, with most of the falls
happened in my home. Within a short period of time, my balancing power
was worsened and finally I have to give up the tennis. Then I tried
table tennis. That didn’t last long and finally I have to give up table
tennis too.
My first major fall
It
was about 2.5 years ago, I was in Costco Parking lot, my wife went in
the store and I took a slow stroll to the store to meet her. While I
was walking on the side walk, the freezing of Gait is visiting me, my 2
legs suddenly frozen, I was trying to get out of this freezing
position, for the next 3 to 5 seconds, I cannot get out of the frozen
position, my feet kept shuffling in the same position for about 5
seconds and suddenly freezing state was gone. What happened was that my
2 feet have been shuffling in the same spot and once it started to
move, it’s like splinter on the starting block, my legs propelled my
upper body forward, while my upper body is launching forward, in order
to keep my balance, my feet are trying to stay in line with my upper
body. I was physically like splinters dashing in his final legs. I was
running so fast and out of control, my feet can never catch up with my
upper body, finally I dived on the concrete pavement with my head and
arms first on the ground. Luckily there was no car around, I broke my
eye glass, with cuts to my forehead, my eyelids, my face, my lips and
my knees. I got up slowly and trying to go to the washroom in the store
to take a look of my face. My face must look horrible; the crowd in the
store was scared because I got a bloody face. Without any warning, the
freezing of my feet happened again. I started to run like crazy again
and finally landed on the floor again. Someone has come to help me to
the washroom to clear my bloody face. I ended up going to the ER and
have stitches in my lips. This was my first major fall.
Going to the DAY PROGRAM AND GET THE TRAINING
I
was scared after the fall, and then I went to my neurologist and asking
for any medication to stop the freezing of gait. The doctor said there
is no known medication for the freezing of Gait, and surgery would not
help either. Exercises seemed to be the most logical remedy for it,
meanwhile, the neurologist suggested using the walker full time. And he
referred me to the Geriatric care in North York General Hospital that
has a Day Program for PD patients. It is a complete medical team
including doctors for Parkinson disease, a nurse to monitor patience
health condition, a speech therapist, social worker, physical
therapist, psychologist, pharmacist, nutrition, physical trainer. The
program runs for 12 weeks, 2 days a week, and 2.5 hours each day. I
went to the day program and learned the preventive ways from falling,
and received speech therapy, endurance training with walking, weight
lifting, balancing technique, chair exercises, and graduated with very
good results. I graduated with a flying color.
5 week trip challenge in 2017
The
12 week day program has boosted my self-confidence. Soon after the day
program training, Dora & I join our friends for 5 weeks trips to
Japan, Taiwan and Hong Kong. Prior to the trip, I have doubts whether I
can handle this long trip both mentally and physically. I brought my
walker with me. My friends will help me to moving the walker when there
are stairs to climb during the trip; otherwise I have managed myself
very well throughout the 5 weeks trip. After this trip, I have
joined 3 more classes of stretching exercise. With the additional
exercises, I am confident that I am on the road to a better
future.
2nd 5-week trip in 2018
With
the successful 5 weeks trip in 2017, I have gained the confidence now,
and I planned for a 2nd trip for 2018, and this trip will be to Japan,
Taiwan, China and Hong Kong for 5 weeks. Things were going fine, I have
joined Chi-gung and Tai-Chi and a Stretching classes every week, my
body is more flexible, I can touch my toe with my fingers. There were a
few falls here and there; nothing serious happened to me, I was looking
forward to our November trip. We have many friends joining us to this
trip. Things didn’t go as planned, on the 2nd day in Tokyo, we went out
for 8 hours shopping, after dinner, I felt tired so I decided to leave
the group and go back to the hotel which is only a few blocks away. 2
friends accompanied me to the hotel. The 10 minute walk became 90
minutes long marathon. The freezing of gait came back again, the
freezing of gait attacked me wave after wave, my legs stuck to the
ground and my arms were resting on the handle of the walker. My upper
body moved forward, and leaving the 2 legs dragging along. The
whole body weight was resting on my 2 arms. It looked like as if I was
doing press up exercise. The worst scenario was crossing the roads,
when I looked down. I saw hundreds of legs moving quickly around me,
which made me more nervous, the more nervous I became, the more
freezing of gaits. I was totally exhausted and was soaking wet when I
finally back to my hotel room. Since this incident, my confidence
dropped like a stone, the simple walking on the street, with the aid of
a walker used to be no problem at all. But now with the bad memory of
the last incident, I have created fear within myself, so comes the
freezing of gait.
After the 2nd Trip
After
the 2nd trip, I have many falls, mostly happened inside my home, mostly
were bruise knees. My knees and legs were having bruises and cuts
all over, some of the old wounds haven’t healed yet, and new wounds on
top of the old wounds. I was getting close to 20 falls in a week. With
these many falls, breaking an arm, legs, and neck will be a matter of
time; the question is when it will happen. That was the low point of my
life, my confidence in walking was very shaky and I had 2 serious falls
within 2 weeks that ended up going to the hospitals. I was desperate in
seeking help to stop can stop the falls. All the techniques and
methods I learned to prevent falling didn’t work. I was scared. Then I
went back to the day program and asked the team for help, unfortunately
the day program was full and the earliest available opening will be 4
months from now.
Introduction to the All Stage Meditation
A
good friend asked me to try an all stage meditation class that he
thought will be good for me. Prior to the presentation, Dora told
me not to rush in joining the all stage meditation program, we need to
think it over before we commit. After the presentation, Dora was
convinced by the Teacher’s presentation, she will join the class too.
In the first 2 classes, we started learning the basic. It looked
easy, and what the teacher’s saying make sense too. I went home with
high hope and enthusiasm, when I started to practice, so many things
going through my mind, I have a hard time trying to get rid of the
thoughts, the more I tried, the more thought keep flying in. 15 minutes
of meditation seemed to be an hour long. I have doubted that
whether this all stage meditation will work for me. The 2nd week
contents also sounds easy to do and also make sense too, unlike the
first class, the 2nd week, my enthusiasm wasn’t there, that I
wasn’t too keen on practicing meditation. She reminded me one of the
teacher’s saying, that is “No-one will be able to help you if you don’t
help yourself “, she really wakes me up, the teacher is right, and from
that day on, I learn to meditate with the right attitude, even I don’t
understand the whole picture now, I won’t make a judgement, all I need
is to do my part honestly and whole heartily, the truth will be
revealed to me sooner or later. With the change of the positive
attitude, I became more patience and relaxed, when thoughts came
through, I won’t try to get rid of the thoughts or images, my mind will
become peaceful very quickly. I have increased the daily practice to 3
times a day.
The 3rd week
I
have a major fall again on Monday, as I got off the car, I
must have stepped on black ice, I flew over the rough asphalt road
surface beside the curb side, I have several cuts below my eyes, above
the eyebrows and near the corner of my right eye. I broke the eye
glasses too. We have to go to the hospital again. I have a MRI to make
sure there is no bleeding in the brain. X ray revealed that I have a
cracked rib which has healed already; it must be the scar of the
previous fall. I have noticed that the wounds have healed very
fast; normally it took weeks to have the wounds to heal. (I am taking a
blood thinner for my heart problem; the blood thinner will cause the
wounds longer to heal). I will give credit to the meditation.
The Magical Moment
Few
days later, I woke up at 4 a.m.; I decided to practice the meditation.
This time I was sitting on the edge of the mattress. Within 5 minutes,
I felt that my upper body started to lean to right side of my body, in
the beginning, the movement was very slow, then my upper body changed
direction, my upper body was rotating as my body glide along from right
side downward (90 degree), then downward and forward (90 – 180
degrees),my upper body picked speed as it is moving down , it will slow
down as glide through and up; it will return to an upright position (a
360 degree rotation). My upper body was in rotation for more than 10
minutes. The axis of the rotation was somewhat 30 degrees vertically.
Slowly and gradually, the axis of the rotation was changing, it ended
up with my back lying on the mattress and my 2 feet in the air, and the
legs are rotating 360 degrees in the air. I have mixed emotions when I
experienced these movements. Part of me was so excited (I expect that
this will happen to someone with many years of experience, no way this
could happened to me?), the other part was a little bit of scared of
what was happening to my body. Because I have a Chronic back pain
for many years, with PD, it has made things worse. With my chronic back
pain, I couldn’t do these movements without inflicting pain to my
back. If it was not by me, who/what was doing the movement?
My mind was very clear at that time. Wouldn’t be a dream these thoughts
just came and gone very quickly. I kept the movements going until I
felt a bit tired, and then I decided to end the session. It was 5
a.m. already. I grab a note pad and recorded the incident. (If it was a
dream, when I wake up, I could not have the notes written on the note
pad.). The following day I posted my incident to the meditation group
and hope they can shed some light about the incident. Teacher David
Yeung pointed out that it is the sub conscious layer is functioning. He
encouraged me to keep it going and do it more often. I am grateful to
our Teacher David Yeung’s constant encouragement.
After the Magical Moment
From
that moment on, I took the Meditation very seriously, and I took
meditation whenever I have time and space to do it. One of the
classmate in the Stretching class told me that she has noticed that my
walking strides were so different from before (she didn’t know that I
am taking the All Stage Meditation), so I told her that must be the
result of the meditation. She and her husband have registered for the
All Stage Meditation program. Another incident was that Teacher David
Yeung has noticed my speech became clearer, the whole class including
Dora agreed. I couldn’t believe how wonderful this All Stage Meditation
is for me. It must have been working full time in the background,
silently yet doing wonders for me. I am out of words. I will tell my
friends about this Meditation, and ask them if they can see or tell any
differences in me. My next challenge is my chronic back pain. I will
show it to you in the near future that my back pain is healed.
I
need to thank Yan Wong for his introduction to this wonderful
Meditation, Teacher David Yeung for his warm hearted encouragement, and
the supports from the classmates, especially Eugene and Raymond, for
their dedication. And my dearest Dora, she has been my support for the
last 10 years. I was blessed to have such wonderful companion who gave
everything for me. She makes breakfast for me every morning, she drives
me to classes and wait in the library until I finished, every time I
have doctor’s appointment, she drives me downtown and bring me back
home, She carries all the heavy stuffs for me when I go to guitar
classes, and she waited patiently in the library for few hours until I
finished. She is doing all the house chores in the house, 3 meals a
day, grocery; washing clothes, clean up the place. Shoveling snow, lawn
mowing ….. She has done it all. And me, a man with no romance, a man
who seldom speaks, a man who spent more time with the computer than
with you. I don’t know how to show my appreciation for your dedication.
I can let everyone know how much you care for me, and from the bottom
of my heart, THANK YOU, DORA, I LOVE YOU.
Pierre Kwok (June, 2019)
(註：覺友Pierre Kwok,
十多年前患上“柏金遜証”，雖經中、西各類治療方法跟進，然病情持續惡化，每下愈況。修習全程靜坐個多月後，體質發生明顯變化，已往因唇舌不受腦部指揮而
令說話含糊不清的情形改變，吐字開始流利、清晰及自然；多年不受腦部控制的雙足及失卻平衡能力的身體，已能接受腦部指揮，活動能力開始恢復
……….等等。以下Pierre Kwok這篇自述，希望能引起大眾及現今醫學界的關注。
―― 楊老師 )
我與帕金森病 (Parkinson Disease) 的鬥爭
我
是 郭世忠 (Pierre Kwok) ，我今年65歲，患上了帕金森病（簡稱PD）已有 16 年了。
帕金森病是一種神經系統疾病，負責控制身體行動的腦細胞正在死亡，這類疾病到目前還沒有醫藥可完全治癒的。PD有許多症狀，包括：手部顫抖，動作緩慢，肌
肉僵硬，說話的聲線很低，別人經常聽不到，
甚至不明患病者所說的意思。腳部肌肉痙攣，手腳無力，走路姿勢向前傾，面無表情，唾液失控，吞食困難，失去平衡，等等。
我的帕金森病是如何開始
很
多年前的一個下午，我正在講電話，左手突然顫抖，約十秒後就停下來了。那天手震顫了幾次。帕金森病
這個名詞曾經浮現在我的腦海中，但我當時並不太擔心。漸漸地，手震顫多了，持續時間長了，初時還可以控制手的震顫，但現在已不受控了。我開始擔心是否患上
了PD。
我問我的家庭醫生我是否我患了PD？他認為我還年輕，患上PD的機會不大。他指出有很多原因導致手部震顫，如壓力，疲倦，睡眠不足，太多咖
啡........都可能引發起手顫，亦可能是肌肉神經系統中可能有問題，他轉介我去一個肌肉神經專科，經過身體檢查後，顯示我的肌肉神經系統正常。我也
做了cad scan
腦部掃描我的大腦，沒有發現有其他因數。最後我被轉介到一位腦科醫生，醫生問了我很多問題後，他叫我在走廊來回行走，又測試了我的關節靈活性，最後他的總
結是我已患上了帕金森病。 當醫生說我有了PD時，我並沒很大反應。
直到第二天下午，我的心情非常惡劣，開始擔心經濟問題，如果失去工作能力怎麼辦？又自責為什麼不買有關的保險？這無法治癒的疾病不會即時奪去我的命，但它
會慢慢地，逐一吞噬我活動能力，最終只會癱瘓一生。 我問上帝為什麼？ 為什麼我會患上此病?
我祈求上帝為我創造奇蹟，治癒我，以後我會向別人見證上帝憐憫及治癒我。
從那時起，除了醫生開的處方外，我也嘗試了練習氣功和太極拳，推拿，按摩，針灸和去看一些出名的的中醫師，我亦嘗試過很多健康食品，花費無數，但沒有任何效果。
醫生告訴我，每天運動會有益於對抗PD。 我選擇學打網球; 我對網球的熱愛讓我每天繼續向前行。 我每週打3到4次網球。在球場上與一些不認識我的人打球時，他們都不知道我患有PD。 在最初的13年中，PD並沒有太多的干擾我的工作和日常生活。
我和帕金森病每天的鬥爭
隨
著時間的過去， 很多PD症狀和體徵逐一浮現。
身體的肌肉收緊至像岩石一樣堅硬。這病像會吸取我的體能，經常使我全身乏力，聲量變得很低，別人幾乎聽不到我在說什麼。
有時當我我要重複幾次以時，他們會假裝聽到了，但我知道這只是禮貌地裝聽到而已。 口腔內過量的唾液分泌，令到唾液不受控地流出來，我會覺得尷尬。
我開始不想與人交談，特別是在嘈雜的環境中。
我很喜歡唱歌，這病奪走我部分唱歌的能力，但我堅持練習唱歌。手指不靈活，我會學結他，讓手指有足夠運動。
雖然PD給我帶來了許多不便和尷尬，除了肌肉痙攣除外，它並沒有引起任何疼痛。 這是可以忍受的，我亦接受的PD存在，我對它的態度也非常積極。
我和帕金森病的鬥爭，屢敗屢戰
大
約3年前，當我打網球時，我開始覺得失去力量和平衡。以前行路和跑步對我來說從來未有問題的，
但現在它每一天，慢慢地，吞掉我的本能。慢慢地我失去兩條腿的控制，體能漸漸地減弱。我和它糾纏６個月，之後我終於放棄我最喜愛的運動。見到一班朋友在打
球時，我只能在旁拍掌鼓勵，但又不能參與，心裡總會有些失落。但我不會放棄運動，亦不可以放棄，我和它爭戰了已有16
年了，如果現在放棄的話，那過去16年的工夫就是白費了！
所以我仍然會爭持下去，見招拆招。之後我嘗試打乒乓球，這也是我幼年時喜愛的運動，初時6個月都打得有來有往，一年後因為身體失去平衡，跌過幾次，結果也
不得不放棄乒乓球。我仍繼續運動，選擇了步行，天氣好時就在街道步行，天氣不好就往大商場步行。
首次的大創傷
有
一天，我陪同 Dora 往 Costco 購物，她泊好車後她就進了商店，
我正在前往商店時，雙腿突然凍結，整個人像一個石像般不能移動，接下來的5到10秒內，我無法衝出這僵硬了的狀態
，大約10秒後，這凍結的狀態突然間消失了。我雙腳一旦得到釋放，一股前衝力量，就像一個賽跑選手在起步線上等待那槍聲一樣。當我的腿向前推動時，我的上
身就撲前，當身體上半身快過雙腿時，就像一個跑手被絆往前扑倒一樣，就是這樣，我的前額，眼皮，臉，嘴唇和膝蓋都傷了，當時沒有人在附近，
我慢慢站起來，前往商店的洗手間，看看我的臉。 我的臉一定很可怕; 滿面鮮血，
商店裡的人群都驚慌，在這一刻，在沒有任何警告下，雙腿突然再凍結，剛才發生的可怕過程又再重覆多一次 ，最後再次跌落在地板上。
今次有人來扶我去洗手間，讓我清洗去我臉上的血跡。 我最終去了急診室，傷口要縫了針， 這是我首次的大創傷。
如何應付同樣事情發生???
自
從那次跌倒之後，我開始害怕了，我問腦科醫生有沒有藥物可以防止我雙腿凍結的現象。醫生告訴我雙腿凍結的現象，是 Freezing of Gait,
，現在尚未有藥物能防止Freezing of Gait，手術也不能幫助。
運動似乎是最邏輯補救方法，他建議我全時間使用助行架，這是可以防止Freezing of Gait 最好的方法。
他又轉介北約克醫院的老年護理中心，為 PD
病人而設的一個完整的醫療團隊，這醫療團隊包括帕金森病的醫生，護士記錄病人的健康狀況，社會工作者，物理治療師，心理醫生，藥劑師，營養師。訓練為期
12個星期，每星期兩天，每天2.5 小時。
我參加了這個計劃，學會了跌倒的預防方法，接受語言治療，步行的耐力訓練，舉重，平衡技術，椅子練習，訓練課程完畢後，我得到非常良好的成績。在這個12
周的訓練，提升了我的自信，培訓完了之后，朋友邀請我們去日本，台灣，和香港旅游，全程共５星期。起初我猶豫我的身体會否適合如此長的旅程呢？於是我詢問
了心臟科醫生，腦科醫生及剛學完的醫療團隊，他們都贊同我前往這次旅程。我和Dora商量之后，亦想試一試自己的身体是否能夠負荷得到？我們就決定參加這
次旅程。
挑戰5星期之旅
為
了防止意外發生，我帶了我的助行車。在旅途中當有樓梯要爬的時候，朋友會幫我搬動助行車;
在整個5星期的旅程中，很多事情都有朋友們幫助，所以整個旅程都很輕鬆。這次挑戰成功，更激發我要做多些運動，於是又參加了太極班，拉筋班，每週４次。
加多了這些運動後，我以為我可以應付 PD了。
再度挑戰
一年後，雖然期間有些跌倒， 跌倒的次數不算太多。又有朋友邀請我們參加，同樣的旅程，今次充滿自信的我，決定再參加這次旅程。
有了上次的經驗，詳細的安排，今次的旅遊應該比第一次好些吧。但事與人違，無論怎麼仔細的策劃與安排，往往有很多意料之外的事情會發生。
在東京的第一天，剛剛遇上東京大塞車，回到酒店時已經九點半了。匆匆出外吃完晚飯。回到酒店已經是淩晨12点鐘。
第二天早上七點半，已吃完早餐。八点集合出發。
我
們外出8小時購物，晚餐後，我已得很累，所以我要求離隊，回酒店休息。有兩位朋友願意陪我返回酒店。我們離開酒店衹是十分鐘而已。所以決定步行回酒店。在
回途中。不幸的事就發生了。Freezing of Gait
突然又出現。而且是接二連三，一波又一波地接續而來，幸好有助行車，否則一定會跌倒受傷。原本十分鐘的路程，變了90分鐘的馬拉松。
當我回到酒店
房間時，我的精力完全耗盡，並滿身大汗。通常在街上簡單的步行，借著助行架的幫助，一向都是沒問題。這一次可怕的記憶，令我失去信心，從心理的恐懼而帶出
Freezing of Gait 。餘下的旅程，我會盡量避免繁忙街道，留在車裡或在餐館等待。整個旅程並沒有意外，只是在酒店房間裡跌倒幾次。
回
家後的兩星期內，我多次在家中跌倒，傷處主要是膝蓋處的瘀腫。
我的膝蓋和腿到處都是瘀傷和割傷，一些舊的創傷還沒有癒合，然而新的創傷開在舊的創傷上面。曾經在一星期內接近有20次跌倒，有著這麼多跌倒，我的手臂，
腿，和頸部折斷是必定的，只是在何時而已。這是我人生的低點，不多久我在兩個星期內有兩次嚴重的跌倒，有一次是在家裡樓梯跌倒，另一次街道上滑倒，結果是
去了醫院。 我是絕望中尋求幫助停止這些跌倒。 所有我以前學過的防止跌倒的方法，好像不再有作用。 我非常害怕。
然後我想北約克醫院的醫療團隊，於是我就前往要求團隊的幫助，不幸的是這醫療團隊病人數已經全滿，有空位的最快要等到四個月後才有空位。
全程靜坐
一
個好朋友叫我參加一個免費講座，由於朋友的盛意，我們就去參加這個免費講座。當我們聽完了楊老師的講座後，覺得他所講的道理非常合理，又有吸引力，我們參
加這個課程。第一、二課，看起來也易學易懂，再加上楊老師的悉心解釋，覺得楊老師所講的非常合理。
我抱懷重燃的希望和興趣來學習，當我開始在家實習靜坐時，很多無關重要的思念都浮現在腦海中，我企圖擺脫那些念頭，我越想擺脫它們，越多念頭湧入來。15
分鐘的靜坐似乎是一小時長。我每天都堅持靜坐，我每天都做兩至三次，因為我已沒有選擇了。我的心其實很矛盾，我經常說我不怕死。但卻怕那等候可時會發生斷
肢的恐懼感及無奈的感覺，如是者兩星期時間就過去了。我開始懷疑這「全程靜坐」會對我有用嗎？我的熱情開始冷卻了, 也不太熱衷於進行靜坐。 Dora
發覺我開始散漫了, 她嚴厲地對我說：
你還記得楊老師曾經說過，“如果你自己都不去幫助自己，在這世界上那有人會幫助你哩﹖”，她的當頭棒喝叫醒了我，自那天起，使我學習到靜坐的正確態度，即
使我不是全面明白「全程靜坐」，我不去作出任何判斷，我只需要全心全意地跟楊老師的指示去做，真理將會遲早在我面前顯現。
有了積極的態度後，我變得更加耐心和輕鬆了，靜坐時當念頭或圖像出現的時候，我不會再試圖擺脫它們，我的心靈很快便變得平和。
我增加了靜坐實踐至每日3次。
過了幾天，我在下車時不小心踏上了一塊冰，我飛撲到馬路旁邊，我雙眼以下、眉毛以上、和右眼眼角邊都有割傷，眼
鏡也爆裂了。 我們又再去醫院的急診室。 我作了一個MRI檢查，以確保大腦中沒有出血。 X 射線發現我一條肋骨曾經裂開過，但已經癒合，
我相信是以前跌倒留下的疤痕。幾天後我留意到這些傷口癒合得非常快，以前通常這些傷口需要幾個星期才可以癒合。
（因為我曾做過心臟通血管手術，每天都要服稀血藥，稀血藥會導致傷口需要長的時間癒合）。 我知道這是「全程靜坐」的功勞。
神奇的時刻
幾
天後，我在早上四點鐘醒來，我決定起來做靜坐。
今次我坐在床墊的邊緣去做靜坐，五分鐘後我感覺到我的上半身開始向前傾，這個傾側是非常緩慢，跟著變方向，我的上身向著順時針旋轉，我的上半身向下移動時
加快速度，跟著它滑上時轉慢，然後返回到起點。 上半身在旋轉超過10分鐘。
之後上半身漸漸向後傾，仍然順時針旋轉。旋轉到最後我的背部躺在床墊上，我的兩腳已離地向上，對著天花板，那兩腿在空中繼續360度旋轉。
當我體驗到這些動作時，心情很複雜。
我一方面覺得非常興奮（我以為這只能發生在有多年靜坐經驗的人士，沒有可能發生在我身上吧？），另一方面我對所發生的事情有點害怕。
這是因為我有背痛多年，加上帕金森症後，事情更糟了。對我來說，我根本沒有可能到剛才的動作，這証明我無可能控制這些動作，但如果這些動作不是我控制，又
是誰呢？
當時我的心境是非常清晰，會不會是我在作夢？不會是走火入魔罷﹖我讓這些動作繼續進行，直到我覺得有點累為止，當我結束這次靜坐，這時已經是早上五點。
我立刻去拿一本筆記簿，將這事件紀錄下來。 （如果這只是一個夢，當我醒來後，沒有可能在筆記薄留下這段紀錄吧）。
第二天我在「全程靜坐」的課堂內，將這件事對覺友們全部說出來，我希望他們可以對這種事有些啟發。 楊老師指出它是意識下層正在工作。
他鼓勵我繼續做下去，而且頻些做。我對楊老師的不斷鼓勵實在心存感激。
神奇時刻之後
從
那一刻起，我對「全程靜坐」的學習和實踐非常認真，當時間和地點適當的時候，我盡量找緊機會去做靜坐。
在一次伸展運動的課堂中，其中一位同學對我說，她注意到我的大步行走如前不同（她並不知道我正在做「全程靜坐」），所以我告訴她這應該是我做靜坐的結果。
她和她的丈夫跟著登記了「全程靜坐」的課程。 另一件事是，楊老師同全班覺友都注意到我的講話比以前更清楚伶俐，Dora 也這樣說。
我不能相信「全程靜坐」對我來說是如此美妙。 這靜坐的一定是在後層全時間全職工作，悄無聲息地對我做出奇蹟來。 我實在不知怎樣形容它。
我會告訴我的朋友關於這「全程靜坐」，並問他們可以看到我同以前有什麼差異。 我的下一個挑戰是我的慢性背痛。
我好肯定在不久的將來，我會顯示給你們我的背痛是痊癒過來。
我需要感謝Yan Wong，他介紹我這個美好的「全程靜坐」的課程，感謝楊洪老師對我的愛心鼓勵，感謝覺友們的支持，尤其是Eugene和Raymond，他們付出的時間和精神。
從我內心發出的萬分感謝。
郭世忠
Pierre Kwok (Editing)
2019-07-23